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Connected to Source, by me.

What makes you think you don’t get to be Source?

I am not a Christian. I don’t follow any one religion because the polarity between “us” and “them”, “our way” and “their way” inherent in any organized belief system doesn’t work for me. I was a minister’s stepdaughter, and the hypocrisy I experienced within the church community wasn’t any different than that found outside the sanctuary doors. It was at odds with what I was being taught, that church should provide a safe environment full of loving and accepting people. I finally quit attending in my early 30s when the minister verbalized his rejection of anyone whose sexual orientation apparently didn’t match his own. When did Jesus get so damn prejudiced?

It’s a basic part of my makeup to hate hate. I hate when others hate and condemn based on color, sex, species, and yes, religion. It’s an ongoing practice for me not to hate the hater. I enjoyed my period of looking down upon the faith as strongly as that preacher looked down his nose at anyone who wasn’t “straight” who may have been sitting in his congregation. It wasn’t until several years later, when a friend and former minister pointed out my own holier than thou attitude, that I realized I had fallen victim to the same superior mindset I’d assigned to that minister and all of Christianity.

I took a good look at the people I love who love Jesus, and I took a good look at the man himself. Watching Passion of the Christ brought home the reality that Jesus was a real flesh and blood human subjected to the worst of humanity’s flaws. Reading and study taught me that he never actually intended or desired to be worshipped, and in fact wished just the opposite. Meditation, intuition, and a strong connection to nature taught me that God is in all of us, that we ~ all of us ~ you, me, Jesus, the red and yellow, black and white, dogs and cats, and even mice, are indeed made of the same beautiful energy. Christians call that energy God. Many others, myself included, call it Source, or Spirit. Jesus knew this connection was true and real, and this is what he lived and taught and died believing. I grew up listening to the Jesus Christ Superstar* soundtrack (thanks, mom!) and I cannot get through this emotional, passionate music without being moved to tears at the sheer, well, humanity of it all. That is what Jesus has given to me.

I look at my stepdad, a Christian and an active churchgoer, and I see an example of the kind of person Jesus knew we could be. I look at many of my friends who call themselves “pagan”, “witch”, “atheist” or simply, “spiritual” and I see those same qualities. I have long not been a fan of Easter. Yet, that we are connected to Source, that we are Source, is worth celebrating. We are part of something so much larger than ourselves, something beautiful. We are manifestations of a vastly creative energy, and, as Jesus and others have taught us, we will live on for eternity after our physical bodies die. All of us. You’re a superstar!


*The original 1970 rock opera soundtrack of Jesus Christ Superstar is available on youtube. You can also hear the full 1996 London Studio Cast soundtrack (which features Alice Cooper singing King Herod’s Song). The 1973 movie is available to rent on Amazon.

The italicized quote at the beginning of the post is from my amazing and insightful life coach and energy healer in response to my desire to take the easy path instead of following intuition and creating the life I envision.

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